5 Steps to Self Love

Because self-love is the first step to building — both receiving and being able to give — love with others.

Self-love is self-respect, not self-righteousness

Self love is show ourselves the same kindness you would show others — in a way that never compromises the kindness we extend to anyone else.

Self love is talking to ourselves with compassion, kindness and care. It’s integrity — telling the truth, following through, and being reliable — and that starts with us.

Self-love is protective, not defensive

We are the only ones in control of our emotional states.

We alone are responsible for our emotional wellbeing, our responses, our self-esteem. Understanding our own worth means accepting that it is independent of every other person we encounter. Real self love is not impacted by anything external, good or bad.

Self-love is ownership, not on others

Self love is accepting responsibility for our own lives, learning how to accept facts rather than deny the, and being accountable for ourselves when everything around you is forcing you the other way.

Self-love is present, not past or future or other places

Self-love doesn’t hinge on future events happening, and it isn’t impacted by anything that happened in the past. It’s also not about pulling away from our real lives or avoidance — it’s about being fully present, time and space, and investing in our existence by way of investing in ourselves.

Real happiness isn’t conditional — it has nothing to do with getting a raise, losing the weight, or finding a partner. And self love is exactly the same way.

Self-love is ongoing, not one-and-done

Just like anything that matters in life— diet, exercise, work, and love of others. We don’t do these things once and think we get away with that lasting forever. It’s an ongoing reinvestment, and the care and keeping of ourselves is no different .

Life will always throw us curve balls. The challenge is to keep moving forward when everything is pulling you back.

Self-love is not a mood. Self-love is a mindset

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